I recently attended a first aid course. Though this was not your usual first aid course but a mental health first aid course provided by MHFA.

I attended this course due to my involvement in work with mental health awareness and reducing the stigma that surrounds this topic. I attended, expecting to be giving methods to help others. What I walked away with though was something else.

I came away from the course with a great appreciation of what conditions exist, how you can help others and strangely at first but makes sense on reflection. How to ensure you, the supporter, the first aider, stay healthy. Look after yourself, you are the most important person in your life.

We Want To Help Others

We all help others to varying degree’s, we want people to be progressing, happy and healthy. If we see someone in need especially if we know them, we want to know what we can do to help or support them.

If we consider the analogy of someone who is not particularly well in a moment in time, someone that is having a rough time and just needs some support. You are going to step in and support them, potentially physically but more likely mentally. You are leaning over, taking their hand and letting them know you are there to support because you care about them.

If that person just needs a little pick me up, then that is all well and good. But if that person still requires support and you are still holding them, well that is going to get harder on you the supporter. Physically you would tire out but crucially, mentally you would also tire out from taking some of that strain

Your Support Network

This is where the training was very clear, you need your own support network. Be it a phone line or a friend. Now they don’t take over from you. They support you, so that you can continue to support the other person.

This doesn’t sound new but it’s crucial to have a network you can rely on, this goes for when supporting others as well as when you are going through a tough time.

The network is made up of friends, family and support lines. We already have an informal network as it is, the people we talk to regularly or drink a tea with. Use your network to help you, you would do the same for them.

Strategies That Help You

When sitting in a group during the course, we discussed about the importance of finding activities that give you energy and help deal with the stresses of life. Someone would go for a drive, another would create a cake. For me one strategy was running, it combines the physical exertion with the mental space to de-clutter and focus.

I know that if I do regular running, it will help with my mental health and therefore need to prioritise this activity for me. Whatever your strategy is, make sure you prioritise it. Book it in your calendar, find someone who does it too to make sure you go along and do it or simply try something new to find that thing.

If you haven’t picked up on the theme yet, it is that you are the most important person in your life!

Positive Self Talk And Recognition

How many times do you berate yourself for mucking up or doing something wrong. How many times do you list the negatives first rather than the positives when asked about a holiday or event. What about when you do a piece of work and think “Not Good Enough”. Said something was hard and sure enough it was hard.

There is enough in the world going on that stresses us out, the last thing we want is ourself stressing ourselves out! Many times I would critically examine my work, worried at every flaw or piece of feedback received. Always focussing on the improve rather than the went well.

What happens though is when we go looking for a mistake, we will invariably find one or create one. If we tell ourselves we are no good at something, our brains literally shut down part of the circuits associated with learning, because we said we were no good. If you instead say you can do this or you are not good right now but will get better. Then you will.

Making Sure You Are Looked After

By you being the best version of yourself means you can then help and support others when they are going through a tough spot. If you don’t look after yourself, then it’s going to be much harder and potentially dangerous for you as you support others.

There are many ways of doing this, many we use. I want to focus on the three ones I listed to help keep your health a top priority

• Your support network. Use your Network, you would do the same for them. It is quite difficult to make that first connection or ask, this is partly why many mental health issues are unknown. Just grab a tea and talk, it definitely helps to talk.
• Strategies that help you. Find yours and prioritise it. This could be anything from meditation, physical exercise to playing a video game. Running is a powerful way I use to combine a bit of physical exercise with mental de-cluttering.
• Positive self talk and recognition. Think about the good things that happened or the good bits you did rather than the other way around. Keep doing this long enough you will have a healthy habit that will last a lifetime.

Look after yourself, you are the most important person in your life. So make sure you prioritise yourself as such.